Yeah, but a joke can't stand when it's built on something that just ain't true! [He shakes his head.] Yeah, you would be the real old-timer here...
[Gumshoe pauses as he listens to them talk about their situation, increasingly distraught.]
What?? Hey, this is no time for mushroom jokes, pal! I know you're an angel and a devil, but that doesn't sound like any kind of place to stay. Just come on over here and get yourself washed up, alright? If you don't have anywhere better to stay, you should just stay around here!
...I don't know enough about halos to know if that's how they work...
[They are a bit of an abstract thing, but he's guessing that's also not entirely serious.]
Well, uh, yeah! I mean, I've been living on my own all this time. It might be nice to have a roommate. And it sounds like you could really use a nice place with running water and all. You'd be welcome here for sure, pal!
[ It is and it isn't serious? It's hard to tell with Angel, simply because they keep such a straight tone and face when they say such things. ]
A roommate? What's a roommate? But sure, it could be nice not to smell and be hungry. I asked someone for food the other day and they more or less scolded me for not having a job or a way of getting my own food. I'm not used to having to do this stuff myself.
[Whether or not it's supposed to be a bit, Gumshoe fits naturally into his role in this comedy routine.]
You don't know what a roommate is? It's pretty much just a word for someone sharing a home with you. Or I guess housemate might be more accurate here, since we can have our own bedrooms. I'd be happy to help you with both of those things, pals! And I can help you learn to take care of yourself too. It sounds like that person you talked to like a jerk, but still, it's important to be able to do those things.
Yea, so? I heard you humans have something called an appendix and I bet you don't know how that works either.
[ Gumshoe is perfect when it comes to comedy! They sometimes fall for Angel's jokes and antics and other times they just do or say something funny. Shit, if Angel could live off of humour, they'd be feeding till their full with Gumshoe around. ]
Huh... Roommate, housemate? Sounds funny but sure okay, I'll be the roommate and you can be the housemate. Will you really help me though? I have stuff stuck between my feathers that I can't reach, I'm not so bothered about my skin, the dirtier I am the less likely anyone is to try and touch me. Oh! Do you have gloves? Just to be on the safe side.
Of course I know what that does! The appendix does... um... uh... It does... human stuff!
[He says that quickly before clearing his throat and changing the subject-]
Of course I'll help you out, pal! I've for gloves and everything! But you can't stop at your wings, you gotta get your whole body clean! ...Wait, why does it sound like I'll be the one doing the cleaning?
[ Can you hear the sarcasm and amusement in their tone Dick, can you? Angel is smirking on the other end of the phone during this part of the conversation. ]
Yea, my hair is tangled at the bottom and I'm pretty sure that smell is my feet. I'm gross! Haha! Might need to borrow some clothes till I can get some new ones because washing them is too much effort. Huh? Well I can't exactly clean myself now can I? My arms only go so far back and it's such an effort. Besides! Isn't that what roommates do?
I'll take your word for it, Dr Gumshoe. Real complicated human shit, uhuh.
[ Angel can hear the nervous laugh and it only makes them smile to themselves. ]
Sure is! That's why I'm getting you to do it instead of doing it myself haha! And, whatever, I don't mind oversized or baggy. It might help people take pity on me and feed me.
[ Oh? What's this now? Angel can't see the redness in their face but they can hear the awkwardness in their voice. ]
They don't? Why not? What kinda roommate do I need to do that sort of thing then? And yea, I would actually appreciate the hand.
[Even he can tell they're not buying it. But it's worth a try!]
Hey, it's not nice using pity to get stuff from people like that. You can still get fed just by being nice to them, pal!
[The awkwardness is very palpable.]
W-well I guess the kinda roommates that are... I guess... used to being like that around each other! [Naked. He clears his throat.] A-anyway, yeah! Sure. I guess I can... help you out!
[ They said, in a knowing, sing-song tone. They're gonna remember this moment and use it against Gumshoe at some point in the future, just watch! ]
It's not? How come? Pity is easier though, I don't have to do as much. You took pity on me just now. Said you're let me move in and help look after me. Or was that because I was nice to you?
[ If only Devil could feed off of awkwardness, Angel would be full all the time. ]
Being around each other like what? ... Naked, you mean?
[ And now the real teasing begins~ ]
I guess you could be naked too when you bathe me. It makes sense after all, means your clothes wouldn't get wet either and if I'm all sticky and messy, you don't wanna get that on your clothes and if you get sticky and messy too, you can just wash yourself off in the bath as well! That's a win-win situation right there roomie!
Th-this isn't pity! It's totally different, pal! [He shake his head quickly.] It's just... someone looking out for someone else! Simple as that.
[And then he goes redder, having trouble even looking at the device while continuing the conversation.]
...Y-yeah. That, that's essentially what it boils down to. Like that!
[He makes some awkward noise, and it's a bit before he carries on.]
I- I don't know about that, pal! I could always wear a, uh, light clothes or towel while I'm helping you out. But I can still take my own bath afterwards, simple as that! H-how dirty are you planning on getting anyhow, huh?? [He isn't even going to touch the parts about stickiness!]
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trenchdoting) wrote2023-01-10 09:26 am
no subject
[Gumshoe pauses as he listens to them talk about their situation, increasingly distraught.]
What?? Hey, this is no time for mushroom jokes, pal! I know you're an angel and a devil, but that doesn't sound like any kind of place to stay. Just come on over here and get yourself washed up, alright? If you don't have anywhere better to stay, you should just stay around here!
no subject
[ They're not even really paying attention to what they're saying when they make that comment, they're honestly just zoning out a little. ]
Still better than the cell I'm used to back in my world... Wait, you mean it? I can come stay with you?
no subject
[They are a bit of an abstract thing, but he's guessing that's also not entirely serious.]
Well, uh, yeah! I mean, I've been living on my own all this time. It might be nice to have a roommate. And it sounds like you could really use a nice place with running water and all. You'd be welcome here for sure, pal!
no subject
[ It is and it isn't serious? It's hard to tell with Angel, simply because they keep such a straight tone and face when they say such things. ]
A roommate? What's a roommate? But sure, it could be nice not to smell and be hungry. I asked someone for food the other day and they more or less scolded me for not having a job or a way of getting my own food. I'm not used to having to do this stuff myself.
no subject
[Whether or not it's supposed to be a bit, Gumshoe fits naturally into his role in this comedy routine.]
You don't know what a roommate is? It's pretty much just a word for someone sharing a home with you. Or I guess housemate might be more accurate here, since we can have our own bedrooms. I'd be happy to help you with both of those things, pals! And I can help you learn to take care of yourself too. It sounds like that person you talked to like a jerk, but still, it's important to be able to do those things.
no subject
[ Gumshoe is perfect when it comes to comedy! They sometimes fall for Angel's jokes and antics and other times they just do or say something funny. Shit, if Angel could live off of humour, they'd be feeding till their full with Gumshoe around. ]
Huh... Roommate, housemate? Sounds funny but sure okay, I'll be the roommate and you can be the housemate. Will you really help me though? I have stuff stuck between my feathers that I can't reach, I'm not so bothered about my skin, the dirtier I am the less likely anyone is to try and touch me. Oh! Do you have gloves? Just to be on the safe side.
no subject
[He says that quickly before clearing his throat and changing the subject-]
Of course I'll help you out, pal! I've for gloves and everything! But you can't stop at your wings, you gotta get your whole body clean! ...Wait, why does it sound like I'll be the one doing the cleaning?
no subject
[ Can you hear the sarcasm and amusement in their tone Dick, can you? Angel is smirking on the other end of the phone during this part of the conversation. ]
Yea, my hair is tangled at the bottom and I'm pretty sure that smell is my feet. I'm gross! Haha! Might need to borrow some clothes till I can get some new ones
because washing them is too much effort.Huh? Well I can't exactly clean myself now can I? My arms only go so far back and it's such an effort. Besides! Isn't that what roommates do?no subject
[A nervous laugh. He rubs at the side of his head .]
Sssounds like a lot of work to do! You can borrow my clothes if you want, but they might be be too big for you...
[And that last part makes him feel redder than ever.]
I- I don't think a lot of roommates do that, pal!! B-but... Uh... I guess... If you're having trouble, I could lend you a hand!!
no subject
[ Angel can hear the nervous laugh and it only makes them smile to themselves. ]
Sure is! That's why I'm getting you to do it instead of doing it myself haha! And, whatever, I don't mind oversized or baggy. It might help people take pity on me and feed me.
[ Oh? What's this now? Angel can't see the redness in their face but they can hear the awkwardness in their voice. ]
They don't? Why not? What kinda roommate do I need to do that sort of thing then? And yea, I would actually appreciate the hand.
no subject
[Even he can tell they're not buying it. But it's worth a try!]
Hey, it's not nice using pity to get stuff from people like that. You can still get fed just by being nice to them, pal!
[The awkwardness is very palpable.]
W-well I guess the kinda roommates that are... I guess... used to being like that around each other! [Naked. He clears his throat.] A-anyway, yeah! Sure. I guess I can... help you out!
no subject
[ They said, in a knowing, sing-song tone. They're gonna remember this moment and use it against Gumshoe at some point in the future, just watch! ]
It's not? How come? Pity is easier though, I don't have to do as much. You took pity on me just now. Said you're let me move in and help look after me. Or was that because I was nice to you?
[ If only Devil could feed off of awkwardness, Angel would be full all the time. ]
Being around each other like what? ... Naked, you mean?
[ And now the real teasing begins~ ]
I guess you could be naked too when you bathe me. It makes sense after all, means your clothes wouldn't get wet either and if I'm all sticky and messy, you don't wanna get that on your clothes and if you get sticky and messy too, you can just wash yourself off in the bath as well! That's a win-win situation right there roomie!
no subject
[And then he goes redder, having trouble even looking at the device while continuing the conversation.]
...Y-yeah. That, that's essentially what it boils down to. Like that!
[He makes some awkward noise, and it's a bit before he carries on.]
I- I don't know about that, pal! I could always wear a, uh, light clothes or towel while I'm helping you out. But I can still take my own bath afterwards, simple as that! H-how dirty are you planning on getting anyhow, huh?? [He isn't even going to touch the parts about stickiness!]